In the wee hours of the morning, the fiend struck once again. Claiming the 21st victim since November, San Francisco’s scourge of temporary sanitation set light to his/her latest work of villainy. On the 2000 block of Broadway in our North Beach, the Serial Shitter Arsonist laid waste to another portable crapper.
For nearly three months, port-a-potties in the North Beach and the Marina of our fair city have been burned to the ground. Averaging seven shitters a month, no transient toilets required by city ordinance to be on site at all construction projects has been safe between Geary and the Bay. This firebug of filth has cut a shit-eating swath of destruction that has gone so far as to attract attention from the national press.
Construction contracters have been forced to camouflage their endangered restrooms. The SFFD’s Arson Task Force is baffled as to the torcher’s motivation. Writers and editors worldwide are running dangerously low on shitcentric circumlocution. It is quite nearly pooper pandemonium.
With the Serial Shitter Arsonist’s work now becoming a crime spree of global notoriety, we are tracking the pyromanic’s handiwork on Google Maps. Each of the currently known 21 blazes are plotted on this map and will be updated with sources should this nefarious scoundrel immolate another innocent mobile commode.
Update: Map has been updated with new icons. Months are color coded and the last strike is signified by the exclamation point.